Tumbling, alive (poem)

Are you safely alone, tumbling
through the whistling of the birds,
having quiet conversations with the trees
The city’s buzzing far ahead
I was in love, but to make clouds, darkening,
using nothing but my breath, or
weave bracelets of colored pain,
like childhood’s daisy strings
I loved but didn’t let me –

Wanting to die, life, was my biggest lie
I only wanted to go home, ever falling
through the silence between words
I wanted – I didn’t say –
But if I am transparent, only visible
I can see the stars reflect at night
I can ask the sun, to shine through me,
and make rainbows dance inside